Saturday, May 27, 2006
went phishing
The last scamming bastard has yet to write me back. Sob.
Oh well, guess I'll just bite at another line. . .
__________
Date: Fri, 26 May 2006 00:32:14 +0100 (GMT+01:00)
From: "Mr Tata" (tatabuchi@virgilio.it)
Subject: From mr bennard
Hello Dear,
My name is Mr. Bennard Tata and I work in the International Operation Department in a Bank here in Africa. On a routine inspection I discovered a dormant domiciliary account with a BAL. Of $36,000,000.00 (Thirty Six Million USD) on further discreet investigation, I also discovered that the account holder has long since passed away (dead) leaving no beneficiary to the account. The bank will approve this money to any foreigner because the former operator of the a/c is a foreigner and from Iraq in particular and I am certainly sure that he is dead, and nobody will come again for the claim of this money
A foreigner can only claim this money with legal claims to the account Holder, therefore I need your cooperation in this transaction.
I will provide the necessary information needed in order to claim this money,
But you will need to open an account where this can be transferred. If interested send your private Telephone No. And Fax number including full details of the account to be used for the Deposit I wish for utmost confidentiality in handling this transaction as my job and the future of my family would be jeopardized if it were breached.
I want to assure you that the transaction is without risk if due process is followed accordingly.
Finally, I will give you 45% for your corporation. Contact immediately for more information.
Sincerely,
Mr. Bennard Tata .
__________
"Hello Dear"?!?!? Sweet, fucking sweet. My reply. . .
__________
Date: Sat, 27 May 2006 21:32:18 -0700 (PDT)
From: "polymer noyz" (dr.noyz@yahoo.com)
Subject: Re: From mr bennard
To: tata6@myway.com
Dear Mister Bennard Tata,
It is surely a sign of the grace of the Good Lord Above that I with much joy received your recent correspondence. Bismillah indeed! Your recent joyous news may soon provide the means to a far more satisfactory end that I believed possible a few scant days hence. Your proposal strikes me at the hour of my darkest need. Please sir, as we are both honest men of business, it is in the interest of negotiation that I trust you will grant me the indulgence to further elucidate my position.
Yes oh yes, it is quite true that for many years I have well understood the rather prudish and puritan nature of the community in which I reside. Typically such narrow-mindedness in the local populace would have long since sent me packing, but alas, to see the flowers here in springtime and to drive the boulevards lined with cherry blossoms. . . Surely sir, you also appreciate the beauty of nature in the multitude of its divine forms.
Ah yes, the beauty of nature in all its divine forms.
I fear my current situation is the result of a rather honest misunderstanding, and much like the plot of most episodes of the 1970's American television program "Three's Company" was built on such a premise, I can only pray that my circumstances also come to such a comic conclusion.
You see my good sir, I live in a town that loves animals. Dogs are welcome in most restaurants, you may find cats in carts at the corner grocery. My urban neighbors raise chickens. Goats freely roam the neighborhood, rummaging through garbage and eating old plastic bottles of Dr Pepper.
While I knew most in my community loved animals as do all good people, I was sadly mistaken as to where those in my community place the limits on their love.
I am neither a barbarian nor a heathen in the field. My parents, God Rest Their Souls, were wonderfully educated and open-minded people who raised and educated me in the traditions of the Three Great Monotheistic Faiths. I am well aware of the immoral nature of my actions. But when Sophie, my beautiful and beloved black Labrador Retriever, looks at me with her big brown eyes as her long pink tongue hangs so seductively from the side of her mouth. . .
Do not judge me sir, for I need not remind you that Adam also gave into temptation.
And yes, while I knew my actions were immoral, I did not know they were illegal until the local District Attorney brought it to my attention while together we viewed a videotape allegedly made by one of my neighbors rather late on a Sunday evening.
For the past 72 hours a rather suspicious looking white van occupied by a man in dark sunglasses has been sitting on the curb opposite my driveway. I have no doubt that I am being surveiled. At this time I am unable to provide you with either a private Telephone No. And/Or Fax number including full details of the account to be used for the Deposit. Please respond to this electronic correspondence with additional information as to how we may proceed with this transaction.
Now that you have a better understanding of my need for the finances to restore my good name, I know you will also understand that your offer of 45% is a very generous offer, much too generous for one such as myself in such dire straits. As my legal expenses exponentially rise, I will gladly settle for 30%, provided we can conclude this transaction most expediently.
I anxiously await your response,
Doctor Polymer Noyz
|
Oh well, guess I'll just bite at another line. . .
__________
Date: Fri, 26 May 2006 00:32:14 +0100 (GMT+01:00)
From: "Mr Tata" (tatabuchi@virgilio.it)
Subject: From mr bennard
Hello Dear,
My name is Mr. Bennard Tata and I work in the International Operation Department in a Bank here in Africa. On a routine inspection I discovered a dormant domiciliary account with a BAL. Of $36,000,000.00 (Thirty Six Million USD) on further discreet investigation, I also discovered that the account holder has long since passed away (dead) leaving no beneficiary to the account. The bank will approve this money to any foreigner because the former operator of the a/c is a foreigner and from Iraq in particular and I am certainly sure that he is dead, and nobody will come again for the claim of this money
A foreigner can only claim this money with legal claims to the account Holder, therefore I need your cooperation in this transaction.
I will provide the necessary information needed in order to claim this money,
But you will need to open an account where this can be transferred. If interested send your private Telephone No. And Fax number including full details of the account to be used for the Deposit I wish for utmost confidentiality in handling this transaction as my job and the future of my family would be jeopardized if it were breached.
I want to assure you that the transaction is without risk if due process is followed accordingly.
Finally, I will give you 45% for your corporation. Contact immediately for more information.
Sincerely,
Mr. Bennard Tata .
__________
"Hello Dear"?!?!? Sweet, fucking sweet. My reply. . .
__________
Date: Sat, 27 May 2006 21:32:18 -0700 (PDT)
From: "polymer noyz" (dr.noyz@yahoo.com)
Subject: Re: From mr bennard
To: tata6@myway.com
Dear Mister Bennard Tata,
It is surely a sign of the grace of the Good Lord Above that I with much joy received your recent correspondence. Bismillah indeed! Your recent joyous news may soon provide the means to a far more satisfactory end that I believed possible a few scant days hence. Your proposal strikes me at the hour of my darkest need. Please sir, as we are both honest men of business, it is in the interest of negotiation that I trust you will grant me the indulgence to further elucidate my position.
Yes oh yes, it is quite true that for many years I have well understood the rather prudish and puritan nature of the community in which I reside. Typically such narrow-mindedness in the local populace would have long since sent me packing, but alas, to see the flowers here in springtime and to drive the boulevards lined with cherry blossoms. . . Surely sir, you also appreciate the beauty of nature in the multitude of its divine forms.
Ah yes, the beauty of nature in all its divine forms.
I fear my current situation is the result of a rather honest misunderstanding, and much like the plot of most episodes of the 1970's American television program "Three's Company" was built on such a premise, I can only pray that my circumstances also come to such a comic conclusion.
You see my good sir, I live in a town that loves animals. Dogs are welcome in most restaurants, you may find cats in carts at the corner grocery. My urban neighbors raise chickens. Goats freely roam the neighborhood, rummaging through garbage and eating old plastic bottles of Dr Pepper.
While I knew most in my community loved animals as do all good people, I was sadly mistaken as to where those in my community place the limits on their love.
I am neither a barbarian nor a heathen in the field. My parents, God Rest Their Souls, were wonderfully educated and open-minded people who raised and educated me in the traditions of the Three Great Monotheistic Faiths. I am well aware of the immoral nature of my actions. But when Sophie, my beautiful and beloved black Labrador Retriever, looks at me with her big brown eyes as her long pink tongue hangs so seductively from the side of her mouth. . .
Do not judge me sir, for I need not remind you that Adam also gave into temptation.
And yes, while I knew my actions were immoral, I did not know they were illegal until the local District Attorney brought it to my attention while together we viewed a videotape allegedly made by one of my neighbors rather late on a Sunday evening.
For the past 72 hours a rather suspicious looking white van occupied by a man in dark sunglasses has been sitting on the curb opposite my driveway. I have no doubt that I am being surveiled. At this time I am unable to provide you with either a private Telephone No. And/Or Fax number including full details of the account to be used for the Deposit. Please respond to this electronic correspondence with additional information as to how we may proceed with this transaction.
Now that you have a better understanding of my need for the finances to restore my good name, I know you will also understand that your offer of 45% is a very generous offer, much too generous for one such as myself in such dire straits. As my legal expenses exponentially rise, I will gladly settle for 30%, provided we can conclude this transaction most expediently.
I anxiously await your response,
Doctor Polymer Noyz
|
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