Thursday, April 22, 2004
uncle walter found. . . alive!
From: Walter Neuss, walter_neuss@hotmail.com
Sent: Wednesday, April 21, 2004 4:09 PM
To: drnoyz@hotmail.com
Subject: Finances of Walter Neuss--your help please!
Herr Doktor P. NOYZ
Midsized American City, United States, STATE
Greetings Herr Doktor:
Permit me to introduce myself to you. I am Herr Walter Neuss and live at present in the city of Cannes in the south of France. Forgive me please for the letter to you, but I wish to get to your attention a matter, which concerns me personally and very seriously. In the last months I was the victim of an identity theft scam, that functions from the United Kingdom. Because I have substantial funds on deposit in the different accounts in Switzerland and in France, some unscrupulous Banker have tried to receive this money over illegal wire transfers by stating that I am deceased.
I believe that you could to have been contacted by one of these individuals and perhaps saying to be an officer of the HSBC banking operations of London. I presuppose that you were selected because your Family name is Noyz, apparently the American spelling of my Family name, Neuss. While it could illuminate us at another time to discuss and determine our mutual family histories, and how we could be being related, I regret that I have more important interests at present.
I am minding that this is a large favor to be imposing on such a stranger as you and a busy doctor, but, as you could imagine I am very troubled by this entire affair and could use each possible support, which you in this situation could do, to help me seek out these individuals. I regret to admit to you that they were already successful in at least one opportunity, to convince a Swiss bank to release some of my capital to someone which wrongly was posing as a relative and beneficiary of my Estate, of which I am of course not deceased as you see by this letter.
Unfortunate for me, I am not able in this situation, to ask for the support of Interpol because of the sensitive nature of my financial holdings. Without too much to elaborate, I say only that much of my net worth is protected heavily from the income Taxes by various means, which need not concern you but I am sure you can imagine about. Additionally much my Capital has its origin from dealings of my father, during the late 1930s, which are regarded unseemly by today's standards and about which also I am sure you can imagine. Consequently I am knowing, that you can understand why the aid of the usual authorities I simply cannot have in this affair.
Everything which would please me from you, is that if you are receiving any further correspondence from anyone which is posing as an Investigator or Banker in regard to my “Estate” that you will forward this correspondence to me, Walter Neuss, at this email address as soon as you receive it. Thank you, Herr Doktor Noyz, for your assistance.
Warmest regards,
Herr Walter NEUSS
_______________
From: Polymer Noyz, drnoyz@hotmail.com
To: walter_neuss@hotmail.com
Sent: Thursday, April 22, 2004 6:04 PM
Subject: RE: Finances of Walter Neuss--your help please!
Unca' Walter! Unca Walter!
Please come home!
I am so glad to have found you after all these years! Ol' Granny will be so pleased. She has always known that someday your true undying love for Aunt Gladys would prevail over your more impure, immoral, and probably illegal pursuits.
It is with much sorrow and sadness that I must quite regretfully inform you that Aunt Gladys died of a bad case of the gout and a broken heart back in 1998.
What's the weather like in Cannes, South of France? You seen any of them bigtime Hollywood types?
I just had this feeling in my bones that it wasn't you they found dead in Cannes, South of France.
Stop playing your silly little games, "Herr Walter Neuss"? C'mon I know it's you, Uncle Walter. I'm so glad to have found you after all these years!
Like ol' Pappy, God rest his soul, used to say, "jus'cuz you painted stripes on the horse, don' mean you'ken call it a zebra."
Incidentally, Pappy went to the other side back in 2000. He was flipping through the channels one afternoon and came upon an episode of MTV's "Jackass" already in progress. He missed that whole warning thing about not trying it at home. Granny's lawyers think it'll be a few more years before that's all worked out.
You wrote, "Additionally much my Capital has its origin from dealings of my father, during the late 1930s, which are regarded unseemly by today's standards and about which also I am sure you can imagine."
Just who do you think your foolin'? You obviously copied that out of the autobiography of President George Bush I.
I am anxiously awaiting your return to the states.
However, before you return, I feel compelled to inform you of one very important piece of information. Several families of Sicilian and possibly Russian origin have outstanding contracts on "Walter Noyz" on account of that unfinished business with the casino robbery. I am quite certain that you will be safe if you travel under your new name.
Neuss. That's funny, rhymes with Seuss. He's my favorite author.
Your loving nephew,
Polymer
|
Sent: Wednesday, April 21, 2004 4:09 PM
To: drnoyz@hotmail.com
Subject: Finances of Walter Neuss--your help please!
Herr Doktor P. NOYZ
Midsized American City, United States, STATE
Greetings Herr Doktor:
Permit me to introduce myself to you. I am Herr Walter Neuss and live at present in the city of Cannes in the south of France. Forgive me please for the letter to you, but I wish to get to your attention a matter, which concerns me personally and very seriously. In the last months I was the victim of an identity theft scam, that functions from the United Kingdom. Because I have substantial funds on deposit in the different accounts in Switzerland and in France, some unscrupulous Banker have tried to receive this money over illegal wire transfers by stating that I am deceased.
I believe that you could to have been contacted by one of these individuals and perhaps saying to be an officer of the HSBC banking operations of London. I presuppose that you were selected because your Family name is Noyz, apparently the American spelling of my Family name, Neuss. While it could illuminate us at another time to discuss and determine our mutual family histories, and how we could be being related, I regret that I have more important interests at present.
I am minding that this is a large favor to be imposing on such a stranger as you and a busy doctor, but, as you could imagine I am very troubled by this entire affair and could use each possible support, which you in this situation could do, to help me seek out these individuals. I regret to admit to you that they were already successful in at least one opportunity, to convince a Swiss bank to release some of my capital to someone which wrongly was posing as a relative and beneficiary of my Estate, of which I am of course not deceased as you see by this letter.
Unfortunate for me, I am not able in this situation, to ask for the support of Interpol because of the sensitive nature of my financial holdings. Without too much to elaborate, I say only that much of my net worth is protected heavily from the income Taxes by various means, which need not concern you but I am sure you can imagine about. Additionally much my Capital has its origin from dealings of my father, during the late 1930s, which are regarded unseemly by today's standards and about which also I am sure you can imagine. Consequently I am knowing, that you can understand why the aid of the usual authorities I simply cannot have in this affair.
Everything which would please me from you, is that if you are receiving any further correspondence from anyone which is posing as an Investigator or Banker in regard to my “Estate” that you will forward this correspondence to me, Walter Neuss, at this email address as soon as you receive it. Thank you, Herr Doktor Noyz, for your assistance.
Warmest regards,
Herr Walter NEUSS
_______________
From: Polymer Noyz, drnoyz@hotmail.com
To: walter_neuss@hotmail.com
Sent: Thursday, April 22, 2004 6:04 PM
Subject: RE: Finances of Walter Neuss--your help please!
Unca' Walter! Unca Walter!
Please come home!
I am so glad to have found you after all these years! Ol' Granny will be so pleased. She has always known that someday your true undying love for Aunt Gladys would prevail over your more impure, immoral, and probably illegal pursuits.
It is with much sorrow and sadness that I must quite regretfully inform you that Aunt Gladys died of a bad case of the gout and a broken heart back in 1998.
What's the weather like in Cannes, South of France? You seen any of them bigtime Hollywood types?
I just had this feeling in my bones that it wasn't you they found dead in Cannes, South of France.
Stop playing your silly little games, "Herr Walter Neuss"? C'mon I know it's you, Uncle Walter. I'm so glad to have found you after all these years!
Like ol' Pappy, God rest his soul, used to say, "jus'cuz you painted stripes on the horse, don' mean you'ken call it a zebra."
Incidentally, Pappy went to the other side back in 2000. He was flipping through the channels one afternoon and came upon an episode of MTV's "Jackass" already in progress. He missed that whole warning thing about not trying it at home. Granny's lawyers think it'll be a few more years before that's all worked out.
You wrote, "Additionally much my Capital has its origin from dealings of my father, during the late 1930s, which are regarded unseemly by today's standards and about which also I am sure you can imagine."
Just who do you think your foolin'? You obviously copied that out of the autobiography of President George Bush I.
I am anxiously awaiting your return to the states.
However, before you return, I feel compelled to inform you of one very important piece of information. Several families of Sicilian and possibly Russian origin have outstanding contracts on "Walter Noyz" on account of that unfinished business with the casino robbery. I am quite certain that you will be safe if you travel under your new name.
Neuss. That's funny, rhymes with Seuss. He's my favorite author.
Your loving nephew,
Polymer
|
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